


Thank God I Found You

by norskheks



Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: Alexis Rose Being a Good Sister, Alexis is a good wingwoman, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Different First Meeting, Coming Out, Crossdressing, M/M, Meet-Cute, POV Patrick Brewer, Patrick Brewer is Gay, Patrick ran away to New York instead of Schitt's Creek, Queer Feelings, The Roses lost a lot of their money but not all of it and stayed in New York
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-28
Updated: 2020-10-28
Packaged: 2021-03-09 02:26:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,961
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27186538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/norskheks/pseuds/norskheks
Summary: Patrick is a workaholic New Yorker who forgets it's Halloween. He runs into some parade-goers on his walk home who completely turn his evening around in unexpected ways.(Rating for swears and vaguely sexual themes)
Relationships: Patrick Brewer/David Rose
Comments: 26
Kudos: 122
Collections: Schitt's Creek Trick Or Treat





	Thank God I Found You

**Author's Note:**

  * In response to a prompt by Anonymous in the [SCTrickOrTreat](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/SCTrickOrTreat) collection. 



> **Prompt:**
> 
> Alternate Universe- Patrick is working in a corporate job in NYC and, while walking home from work, bumps into the Village Halloween Parade, in which David is participating (and wearing a costume that ends up winning an award).
> 
> I'd love to see some gay-awakening Patrick, a meet-ugly turned meet-cute, and some tropey nonsense, but really how it goes is up to you!

Patrick checks the clock before shutting down his computer and grabbing his earbuds. It's 7:04. He’d stayed at work much longer than he’d intended once again. He stands up in his cubicle and looks around the office. Well, at least he's not the only one. Several people are typing at their desks, staring into their screens like robots.

He puts on his jacket and slings his bag over his shoulder as he picks an album to listen to as he walks home. It's getting colder out, but after a whole day in the office, a long walk sounds really nice. He could use a good long think. He waves goodbye to his cubicle neighbor and heads out of the building.

It's been almost a year since he moved to New York from the suburbs of Toronto, taking a cushy job as a financial analyst and finally getting out what he put into his MBA. He knows he was lucky to find, let alone afford, a decent Chelsea studio.

He would have left his hometown even if he hadn't gotten the job and the apartment, though. "Left", he thinks, is a gracious way to put it. "Fled" is more accurate. He'd found himself suffocated by his family, his fiancée, the weight of their expectations. It had taken him a while to understand why. It wasn't until he'd been here for a month or two that he admitted to himself that he came here because he'd thought maybe New York would be an easier place to be gay.

In a sense, it is—he isn't living a lie anymore—but it turns out that it's really hard to meet people and make friends as an adult. Nobody at work seems to care enough to learn anything about him, least of all his sexual orientation. And going to bars and clubs alone looking for hook-ups is really not his style. The brazen queer new life he'd imagined for himself here had just sort of turned into a nine-to-five (well, seven or eight, more often than not) sludge, and wandering around the Village and taking trips up to Central Park alone on weekends he isn't working. And he hadn't even come out to anyone at home yet because it felt stupid to do it before he'd even so much as kissed a man. What if he had misunderstood what had been making him so unhappy? Because, though it's better than feeling stuck in a relationship with someone he isn't attracted to, he doesn't feel all that happy now. He feels... lonely.

But Patrick isn't one to wallow in self-pity for very long, and the whole point of this long thinking walk was to find a solution. He resolves to try harder to meet people, and google activities nearby he's interested in, as he turns onto 6th Ave and almost walks right into—a bigfoot?

 _Oh shit_ , he thinks, _it's Halloween_.

He can't believe he forgot. And the parade is only a few blocks from his apartment... clearly, from the looks of it, going up 6th Ave.

 _I should get some candy for trick-or-treaters_ , he thinks inanely as he spots a Duane Reade on the corner. Then he remembers that he lives on a third-floor apartment in Manhattan, and he is absolutely not going to be getting any trick-or-treaters. But he is thirsty, and he still has a ways to go before he gets home, so he heads into the store anyway to get a bottle of water.

Patrick gets in line (he refuses to say _on_ line like the locals) behind several people in costumes. Right in front of him is a stunningly beautiful young blonde woman dressed as a Playboy Bunny. She's talking to a tall man (so far as Patrick can tell anyway) in a long blond curly wig who's currently standing with his back to Patrick. He's wearing all white, t-shirt and shorts, and the shorts have a rainbow spray-painted on the ass.

 _Oh, that's right_ , Patrick thinks. He'd read about the parade, that it was started by the gay community, and that even though tons of straight people participate now, it still has a bit of a gay vibe to it. He's a little disappointed he'd forgotten, now that he recalls that factoid.

Also, he has to admit that the stranger's rainbow-clad ass is very nice. He looks away as soon as he realizes what he's doing.

Unfortunately, upon doing so, he accidentally makes eye contact with the Playboy Bunny, who smiles at him in a way that makes him think she absolutely caught him looking. _Oops_.

"Oh my god, David," she says to her companion. "Look at this cutie-patootie!" She gestures to Patrick and they both turn to him. "Let me guess, you're supposed to be, like, James Bond or something!"

Patrick feels his face flush as he chuckles and looks from the Bunny to the man ( _David_ , apparently). There's another rainbow spray-painted on his chest, and the wig—which Patrick now sees has one of those nineties-style plastic hair clips in it—clashes with his olive skin and his dark eyebrows and body hair. But, like his companion, he is absolutely, stunningly beautiful. Patrick feels a chill go up his spine and butterflies in his stomach.

"No, no," he says, managing to wrest his gaze away from the gorgeous rainbow-clad man to answer the Bunny. "I'm just coming home from work, I'm not... I'm not dressed up."

"Oh no!" she says. "But they won't let you in the parade without a costume!" Her eyes widen as if she's genuinely distressed that Patrick, a perfect stranger, won't be able to join the parade.

Patrick wonders if she's flirting with him, or—since she probably caught him leering—flirting with him _for_ David.

"Ugh, Alexis, leave the poor guy alone," David tells the Bunny, giving Patrick an apologetic grimace.

Patrick feels another chill go through him as he realizes that David's voice is as beautiful as the rest of him. His brain desperately scrambles for something that might get him to keep talking forever.

"No, it's okay," he reassures them. "I like your costumes."

They both beam, but the Bunny ( _Alexis_ , he remembers) speaks.

"That's _so_ sweet! I kept telling my brother that no one would recognize his costume, but he, like, insisted."

Patrick isn't entirely surprised, but is a little embarrassed, to feel his body relax a bit at finding out they're siblings. He had guessed the rainbows were a gay pride thing, and that they therefore weren't _together_ , but... you never know.

"Alexis," David says sharply, "it is a _classic_ album cover. People will get it!"

Patrick can't find it in him to tell him he doesn't have any idea what album he's talking about.

"Anyway," David continues, "we were _supposed_ to have a nineties theme, but you went with _this_ played-out costume instead."

"Um, there were Playboy Bunnies in the nineties, David! And sorry if I look _really_ good in this costume!"

"I, uh, actually forgot it was Halloween," Patrick admits. "So, I think I'll just be watching the parade this year."

"Oh my god, you poor thing!" Alexis says, putting her hand on his arm gently. "Wait, wait, we can save this."

"...Save this?"

"Oh my god, I have the best idea. David, you can have your little nineties theme with, um—"

"Patrick," he helpfully supplies, holding his hand out automatically for a handshake. Alexis ignores it, but David takes it gently. Patrick feels an electric jolt through his hand and up his arm.

"Patrick!" Alexis finishes. "Wait, David, save my place, I'll be right back!" And she starts running—rather impressively in the heels she's wearing—out of the line and back into the store, whooping excitedly like Curly from the Three Stooges.

David eyes the line in front of them nervously; there are only a few people left. "Okay, but hurry up, though!" he yells at his sister.

"I'm sorry," he says to Patrick, "she's kind of a lot. You don't have to join us if you don't want to."

"No, I'd, uh, like that. If you don't mind, that is."

The corner of David's mouth rises in a little half-smile that's entirely too endearing. "No, I—I don't mind."

Alexis comes running back, before Patrick can do something insane like kiss a man for the first time at the front of a Duane Reade line, with something in each hand.

"Okay, okay," she says, "so if you put on these sunglasses—" and she puts them on Patrick's face, "—with your fancy little suit, you're basically Tommy Lee Jones in _Men in Black_!"

Patrick laughs. He's pretty sure he bears very little resemblance to the character, but he'll work with it.

"And," Alexis continues, "you can carry this tech-gadgety-looking pen, like the memory eraser thing or whatever they use!"

"Huh," Patrick says, taking the pen, "that's... actually a great idea."

"Well, don't sound so surprised," Alexis says, but her smile doesn't fade, so he doesn't think she's actually offended. "If I can disguise Kiera Knightley well enough to help her escape a Philippine prison, I think I can put together a last-minute Halloween costume."

"...What?"

But before Alexis can explain, she and David are called to the next available counter. They make their purchases and wait for Patrick.

Patrick buys the pen, the sunglasses, and the water, and rips the price tags off the first two as he makes his way towards the two new friends he absolutely never imagined he would be making tonight. He puts the glasses on and puts the pen in his pocket so it sticks out a little.

"How do I look?"

"If I was an alien, I'd be, like, so scared right now," Alexis assures him with an "okay" hand gesture.

They step out onto the street and Patrick realizes the sunglasses are going to be an adjustment in the dark. He follows David's bright outfit as they join the crowd of costumed celebrants making their way onto 6th Ave.

As his eyes adjust to the shades, the costumes gradually come into focus as they walk. There are a lot of traditional monster costumes, a ton of pop culture and movie costumes, and some just silly ones—one couple is dressed up as milk and cookies. Some costumes are elaborate and involve bicycles or homemade vehicles and structures that take up a huge amount of space. There are floats and lights, and there are spectators behind metal barricades on the sidewalk. There's music coming from multiple directions. It's loud, raucous, and joyful, and it's a sensory overload. Patrick just looks all around him as he walks, checking every minute or so to make sure he hasn't fallen behind David and Alexis. He's sure he looks like a tourist, but he can't quite bring himself to care.

A few blocks into the parade, someone behind them sprays silly string all over, and David shrieks as he frantically tries to get pieces of it out of his wig.

"Fuck, Mom is going to kill me!"

"I _told_ you not to take her wig, David! She's probably, like, freaking out looking for it right now."

"Here, let me help," Patrick offers as he digs a piece of gross foam out of a ringlet. "You stole a wig from your mom?"

"She has like fifty of them," David explains, "and she hasn't worn this one in forever. I don't even think she likes it."

Patrick laughs. He thinks David and Alexis are full of interesting stories. He thinks he'd love to hear them all someday.

After about the third time someone asks David who he is, he snaps.

"I'm obviously Mariah Carey from the cover of her critically acclaimed 1999 album _Rainbow_! What is wrong with you people?!"

Patrick bites his lip to try and hide his laughter.

"I told you, David!" Alexis scolds. "Not everyone is a nerd like you."

"I'm not—" David starts. "Excuse me if I have taste in music!"

Alexis rolls her eyes in Patrick's direction, as if to say, _Can you believe him?_

Patrick just grins. "David, I have a confession."

"What?" He sounds impatient.

"I, uh, I also had no idea who you were supposed to be."

"Oh my _god_ , I can't believe we invited you."

"I'm sorry." Patrick takes a beat, and decides to be brave. "Does this mean I get my gay card revoked?"

David turns sharply and looks at him. Patrick can see Alexis's jaw drop out of the corner of his eye.

"Maybe!" David says petulantly. "Not that I have any authority over that, though."

"Oh, you're not on the... admissions committee?" he teases.

"Um, no, though I do probably... know some people I can talk to."

"Uh-huh."

David goes quiet for a minute and Patrick starts to worry he's said something wrong, gone too far.

When David speaks again, he sounds much more serious. "One of the reasons I picked this costume is, um, see the rainbow?"

Patrick nods.

"The green and purple lines are really thin, so it looks like it's basically blue, yellow, and pink. Those are the colors on the pansexual pride flag."

"Oh," Patrick says, embarrassed by his mistake.

"Gender isn't really a factor in who I'm attracted to," David explains. "I'm pan."

Patrick nods. "Thank you for telling me. I'm sorry for... assuming."

David waves his hand and smiles again, as if to signal that the serious talk is over. "It's fine, you'd only be like the ten millionth person. And I'm literally wearing rainbows. And, like, a little bit in drag."

"Well, still."

The conversation lulls comfortably for a few blocks and they continue to take in the parade. Patrick realizes that it might have actually been more interesting, objectively, to watch the parade from a single point so he could see all the floats and bands and costumes. But he thinks that even if he and David part ways with a formal handshake and never see each other again, this time with him would be worth missing the rest of the parade for. At the very least, he's practiced coming out to someone.

 _Oh_. That was the first time he'd ever come out to anyone. _Huh. Maybe I should tell him that._

"So, Patrick," Alexis says, interrupting his thoughts, "what do you do in that little business suit of yours? Are you, like, a... funeral director? Or a... divorce lawyer?"

"I'm a financial analyst, actually," he says, not sure whether he wants to know why her first thoughts were so dark. "It's... boring and unfulfilling, but hey, it pays the bills."

"Mmm, for sure," she says, her eyes glossing over with disinterest.

"So, what do you guys do?"

"I am a publicist and life coach," she says with a demure grin.

"She's a receptionist," David says darkly, "and I'm in retail."

"Ugh, David, you're such a downer. Okay, I'm still working on starting my own PR firm, but I'm, like, doing it."

"Well... that's great," Patrick offers.

He sees David's expressive face go on a journey that seems to end in him deciding to say what he was debating whether or not to say.

"Do you know Rose Video?"

"Yeah," Patrick said. "I used to work at one in high school. They're not... still around, are they?" Was that the retail store David worked at? Then he remembered something else. "Didn't they lose a bunch of their money a couple of years ago or something?"

"No, they're not still around," David answered, "And yes... we did." He pauses to dramatic effect, then gestures to himself and his sister. "David Rose and Alexis Rose, heirs to the _thriving_ Rose Video empire."

"Oh," Patrick says, not knowing quite what to say. "I'm... sorry about what happened to you guys."

"Don't be," he says.

"Yeah, it was, like, for the best," Alexis says. "We found out who all our fake friends were."

"Anyway," David pressed on, "that's why we're, like, at the beginning of our careers right now. Although now that I've said that out loud, I'm not sure if that's more or less pathetic than seeming like unambitious stoners."

Patrick laughs. "Not pathetic," he assures David.

They continue talking as they walk up 6th Ave with the crowd. Patrick tells them about how he left his fiancée in an attempt to live a more authentic life in New York, and he learns that the Roses also have Canadian citizenship and have spent a significant amount of time in Toronto, though they no longer have a house there. They bond over bagged milk and Nanaimo bars.

As they approach 16th Street and the end of the parade, Patrick's heart sinks to his stomach. He doesn't want to say goodbye yet. His apartment is only a few blocks away, and he has to work tomorrow, but not too early—should he invite them over?

"So, um," David starts as the crowd starts to split, "there's an afterparty. We were planning on going, if you...."

"Yes!" Patrick almost shouts, and he's immediately embarrassed and brings it down several notches. "Yes, I'd love to come, if that's...."

"Oh my god," Alexis huffs. "Yes, Patrick, you're coming, and we're taking a cab because my feet hurt."

Patrick suddenly realizes Alexis just walked, what, twenty blocks, in heels? And he thought _his_ feet were starting to ache in his flat dress shoes.

Alexis hails a cab and the three of them squeeze in the back, Alexis in the middle. It's a short drive, but he's grateful for the rest to his legs and feet. He takes the sunglasses off so he can see inside.

They get into the afterparty, and it's... a lot. DJs are playing very loud bass-heavy music, and there are a lot of sexy people dancing, both on the floor and on stages. Patrick has a twinge of regret. It's decidedly not his scene.

But David grabs his hand so he doesn't get lost—Alexis is _very_ good at snaking through crowds quickly—and the regret disappears and is replaced with butterflies in his stomach again as they find a little corner to dance in.

Patrick is an awful dancer, and he confesses as much as soon as he can to reduce the possibility of being laughed out of the building.

David just smiles and shakes his head at him. "That's another point off your gay card," he teases, taking his hand again and starting to dance. David isn't exactly a _good_ dancer, but he seems comfortable in his body in a way that Patrick has never really been, and that gives him an advantage.

Patrick is just starting to feel brave enough to crowd into David's space a bit, wondering if the crackle of electricity he feels between them is real or just in his head, when the costume contest is announced.

"You should enter," he tells David, "so people who get your costume can see it."

David scowls but says, "Fine."

He joins the contestants on stage. Patrick and Alexis stay behind in the crowd, knowing that neither of them are exactly going to win anything for creativity.

Each contestant does something of a runway walk to show off their costume. Apparently, the DJ recognizes David's costume, because when it's his turn, it's obviously a Mariah Carey song that starts playing (though Patrick couldn't say which one). This seems to bolster David's confidence as he struts across the stage in time to the music. He does a hair flip and then runs his hands down the sides of his torso, moving his hips in what's clearly meant as a seductive move, and, well, it _works_.

Patrick's mouth goes dry as Alexis nudges him.

"You're welcome," she says, with an awkward attempt at a wink.

David's walk is over, and he stays up with the other contestants, waiting for winners to be called. There are, apparently, several categories. A severed head wins "Most Gruesome", and a woman who Patrick is pretty sure is naked and covered in elaborate thick paint to look like a tiger wins "Best Animal Costume".

"Best Retro Costume is... Mariah Carey!"

Patrick can hear David scream excitedly from the crowd as he rushes forward to accept his award (in the form of a little figurine) and waves to the crowd and blows them a kiss.

"Oh my god, David!" Alexis shouts, turning to Patrick. "He did it!"

Patrick can't help but grin excitedly as David is ushered off the stage and runs down to where they are. He practically knocks Alexis out of the way and is running towards Patrick, grabbing him by the lapels of his jacket, looking in his eyes, then down to his lips, and suddenly he's kissing him.

David is _kissing_ him, and he's kissing David, and it's the best kiss Patrick's ever had, and he doesn't want it to end. The kiss is assertive but relatively chaste, firm lips but no tongue. He grabs David by the waist and pulls him closer as every nerve ending in his lips, in his fingers, in his entire body, tingles and the butterflies in his stomach flap harder. David's hand is at the base of his neck, and he feels like his skin is on fire where he's touching him.

Patrick finally pulls away, grinning, unwilling to go too far and resting his forehead on David's.

"Thank you," he whispers.

"For what?" David asks.

"I've never done that before, with a guy."

"Well," David says, a teasing tone in his voice, "I guess you've earned a point back on your gay card now."

Patrick throws his head back and laughs, then goes back and kisses David again, a sweet, soft, innocent kiss. "Does that count for another point?" he asks.

"Mmm," David answers non-committally. "Keep kissing me and maybe you can upgrade to platinum."

Patrick goes in for another kiss, then stops. "Wait. Is it a credit card? I thought it was like a license...."

"Shut up," David says before resuming the kissing.

"Um, this is really cute for you guys," Alexis's voice breaks through, "but I'm still here, and there's like a limit to how much time I can spend a day watching my brother make out."

Patrick reluctantly pulls away fully from David, even as David gives her a middle finger without moving away from Patrick. "Sorry, Alexis."

"No you're not," she says, "but it's okay. Patrick, dance with me!"

So he does, giving his best apologetic look to David, who eventually gives up and joins them.

They all dance for a while longer, and then Patrick starts yawning and remembers he has to work the next day.

"I have to go," he keeps saying, only to go in for another kiss with David, each one deeper than the last.

"Oh my god, David!" Alexis finally says. "Let the poor man go!"

Patrick grins and takes out his phone, opening his contacts. "Give me your number," he says.

Instead, David takes his phone and enters his number himself, handing his own phone to Patrick to do the same.

After one last passionate kiss, he leaves David and Alexis and goes outside to hail a cab home. He wonders if it's too soon to text on the way home—don't people say you should wait at least a day or something?—but decides he doesn't care.

He opens his contacts and sees the new entry, 🌈David🌈, and texts him.

_Thanks for a great night. When can I see you again?_

He doesn't expect a reply right away, but it comes.

_im free thurs night, hbu?_

Patrick grins as he pays the cabbie and gets his keys out as he approaches his door.

_It's a date.❤️_

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to my irl friend Alexis for all your brainstorming help!
> 
> I confess that even after 10 years of living in the NY metro area, I have never been to the Village Halloween Parade, so I made some things up, especially about the afterparty (apparently irl the costume contest is after midnight and I had no idea what to do with these characters in a club for like 3 hours). Please excuse any inaccuracies. Also there are no Duane Reades in the West Village, but like, bite me, it's an institution. I also maybe should have broken this up a bit better, but I'm a huge procrastinator and didn't have time, so it'll have to do. 
> 
> Hope you enjoyed our soft soft boys! Title is the name of the last track on _Rainbow_.


End file.
